第189章

``I don't know?' You cannot but know, since the Lord God in His infinite mercy has revealed it to us. Or your child will ask you: ``What awaits me in the life beyond the grave?' What will you say to him when you know nothing? How will you answer him? Will you leave him to the allurements of the world and the devil? That's not right,' he said, and he stopped, putting his head on one side and looking at Levin with his kindly, gentle eyes.

Levin made no answer this time, not because he did not want to enter upon a discussion with the priest, but because no one had ever asked him such questions - and when his babes did ask him those questions, it would be time enough to think about answering them.

`You are entering upon a time of life,' pursued the priest, `when you must choose your path and keep to it. Pray to God that He may in His mercy aid you and have mercy on you!' he concluded. `Our Lord and God, Jesus Christ, in the abundance and riches of His loving-kindness, forgives this child...' and, finishing the prayer of absolution, the priest blessed him and dismissed him.

On getting home that day, Levin had a delightful sense of relief at the awkward position being over and having been got through without his having to tell a lie. Apart from this, there remained a vague memory that what the kind, fine old fellow had said had not been at all as stupid as he had fancied at first, and that there was something in it that must be cleared up.

`Of course, not now,' thought Levin, `but at some later day.'

Levin felt more than ever now that there was something not clear and not clean in his soul, and that, in regard to religion, he was in the same position which he perceived so clearly and disliked in others, and for which he blamed his friend Sviiazhsky.

Levin spent that evening with his betrothed at Dolly's, and was in very high spirits. To explain to Stepan Arkadyevich the state of excitement in which he found himself, he said that he was happy, like a dog being trained to jump through a hoop, who, having at last caught the idea, and done what was required of him, whines and wags its tail, and jumps up to the table and the window sills in its delight.

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TOLSTOY: Anna Karenina Part 5, Chapter 02[Previous Chapter] [Table of Contents] Chapter 2 On the day of the wedding, according to the Russian custom (the Princess and Darya Alexandrovna insisted on strictly keeping all the customs), Levin did not see his betrothed, and dined at his hotel with three bachelor friends, casually brought together at his rooms. These were Sergei Ivanovich, Katavassov, a university friend, now professor of natural science, whom Levin had met in the street and insisted on taking home with him, and Chirikov, his best man, a Moscow justice of the peace, Levin's companion in his bear hunts.

The dinner was a very merry one: Sergei Ivanovich was in his happiest mood, and was much amused by Katavassov's originality. Katavassov, feeling his originality was appreciated and understood, made the most of it. Chirikov always gave a lively and good-humored support to conversation of any sort.

`See, now,' said Katavassov, drawling his words from a habit acquired in the lecture room, `what a capable fellow was our friend Konstantin Dmitrievich.

I'm speaking of absent company - he doesn't exist for us now. At the time he left the university he was fond of science, took an interest in humanity;now one-half of his abilities is devoted to deceiving himself, and the other to justifying the deceit.'

`A more determined enemy of matrimony than you I never saw,' said Sergei Ivanovich.

`Oh, no, I'm not an enemy of matrimony. I'm in favor of division of labor. People who can do nothing else ought to rear people, while the rest work for their happiness and enlightenment. That's how I look at it.

To muddle up two trades there are too many amateurs; I'm not one of their number.'

`How happy I shall be when I hear that you're in love!' said Levin.

`Please invite me to the wedding.'

`I'm in love now.'

`Yes, with a cuttlefish! You know,' Levin turned to his brother, `Mikhail Semionovich is writing a work on the digestive organs of the...'

`Now, make a muddle of it! It doesn't matter what about. And the fact is, I certainly do love cuttlefish.'

`But that's no hindrance to your loving your wife.'

`The cuttlefish is no hindrance. The wife is the hindrance.'

`Why so?'

`Oh, you'll see! You care about farming, hunting - well, you'll see!...'

`Arkhip was here today; he said there were no end of elk in Prudnoe, and two bears,' said Chirikov.

`Well, you must go and get them without me.'

`Ah, that's the truth,' said Sergei Ivanovich. `And you may say good-by to bear hunting for the future - your wife won't allow it!'

Levin smiled. The picture of his wife not letting him go was so pleasant that he was ready to renounce forever the delights of looking upon bears.

`Still, it's a pity they should get those two bears without you.

Do you remember last time at Khapilovo? And now it would be a delightful hunt!' said Chirikov.

Levin had not the heart to disillusion him of the notion that there could be something delightful apart from her, and so said nothing.

`There's some sense in this custom of saying good-by to bachelor life,' said Sergei Ivanovich. `However happy you may be, you must regret your freedom.'

`And confess there is a feeling that you want to jump out of the window, like Gogol's bridegroom?'

`Of course there is, but he won't confess,' said Katavassov, and he broke into loud laughter.

`Oh, well, the window's open.... Let's start off this instant to Tver! There's a big she-bear; one can go right up to the lair. Seriously, let's go by the five o'clock! And here let them do what they like,' said Chirikov smiling.

`Well, now, on my honor,' said Levin smiling, `I can't find in my heart that feeling of regret for my freedom.'

`Yes, there's such a chaos in your heart just now that you can't find anything there,' said Katavassov. `Wait a bit, when you set it to rights a little, you'll find it!'