第46章

'There!'he said,holding out his hand to her.She took the little drab thing between her hands,and there it stood,on its impossible little stalks of legs,its atom of balancing life trembling through its almost weightless feet into Connie's hands.But it lifted its handsome,clean-shaped little head boldly,and looked sharply round,and gave a little 'peep'.'So adorable!

So cheeky!'she said softly.

The keeper,squatting beside her,was also watching with an amused face the bold little bird in her hands.Suddenly he saw a tear fall on to her wrist.

And he stood up,and stood away,moving to the other coop.For suddenly he was aware of the old flame shooting and leaping up in his loins,that he had hoped was quiescent for ever.He fought against it,turning his back to her.But it leapt,and leapt downwards,circling in his knees.

He turned again to look at her.She was kneeling and holding her two hands slowly forward,blindly,so that the chicken should run in to the mother-hen again.And there was something so mute and forlorn in her,compassion flamed in his bowels for her.

Without knowing,he came quickly towards her and crouched beside her again,taking the chick from her hands,because she was afraid of the hen,and putting it back in the coop.At the back of his loins the lire suddenly darted stronger.

He glanced apprehensively at her.Her face was averted,and she was crying blindly,in all the anguish of her generation's forlornness.His heart melted suddenly,like a drop of fire,and he put out his hand and laid his lingers on her knee.

'You shouldn't cry,'he said softly.

But then she put her hands over her face and felt that really her heart was broken and nothing mattered any more.

He laid his hand on her shoulder,and softly,gently,it began to travel down the curve of her back,blindly,with a blind stroking motion,to the curve of her crouching loins.And there his hand softly,softly,stroked the curve of her flank,in the blind instinctive caress.

She had found her scrap of handkerchief and was blindly trying to dry her face.

'Shall you come to the hut?'he said,in a quiet,neutral voice.

And closing his hand softly on her upper arm,he drew her up and led her slowly to the hut,not letting go of her till she was inside.Then he cleared aside the chair and table,and took a brown,soldier's blanket from the tool chest,spreading it slowly.She glanced at his face,as she stood motionless.

His face was pale and without expression,like that of a man submitting to fate.

'You lie there,'he said softly,and he shut the door,so that it was dark,quite dark.

With a queer obedience,she lay down on the blanket.Then she felt the soft,groping,helplessly desirous hand touching her body,feeling for her face.The hand stroked her face softly,softly,with infinite soothing and assurance,and at last there was the soft touch of a kiss on her cheek.

She lay quite still,in a sort of sleep,in a sort of dream.Then she quivered as she felt his hand groping softly,yet with queer thwarted clumsiness,among her 'clothing.Yet the hand knew,too,how to unclothe her where it wanted.He drew down the thin silk sheath,slowly,carefully,right down and over her feet.Then with a quiver of exquisite pleasure he touched the warm soft body,and touched her navel for a moment in a kiss.And he had to come in to her at once,to enter the peace on earth of her soft,quiescent body.It was the moment of pure peace for him,the entry into the body of the woman.

She lay still,in a kind of sleep,always in a kind of sleep.The activity,the orgasm was his,all his;she could strive for herself no more.Even the tightness of his arms round her,even the intense movement of his body,and the springing of his seed in her,was a kind of sleep,from which she did not begin to rouse till he had finished and lay softly panting against her breast.

Then she wondered,just dimly wondered,why?Why was this necessary?

Why had it lifted a great cloud from her and given her peace?Was it real?

Was it real?

Her tormented modern-woman's brain still had no rest.Was it real?And she knew,if she gave herself to the man,it was real.But if she kept herself for herself it was nothing.She was old;millions of years old,she felt.And at last,she could bear the burden of herself no more.She was to be had for the taking.To be had for the taking.

The man lay in a mysterious stillness.What was he feeling?What was he thinking?She did not know.He was a strange man to her,she did not know him.She must only wait,for she did not dare to break his mysterious stillness.He lay there with his arms round her,his body on hers,his wet body touching hers,so close.And completely unknown.Yet not unpeaceful.

His very stillness was peaceful.

She knew that,when at last he roused and drew away from her.It was like an abandonment.He drew her dress in the darkness down over her knees and stood a few moments,apparently adjusting his own clothing.Then he quietly opened the door and went out.

She saw a very brilliant little moon shining above the afterglow over the oaks.Quickly she got up and arranged herself she was tidy.Then she went to the door of the hut.

All the lower wood was in shadow,almost darkness.Yet the sky overhead was crystal.But it shed hardly any light.He came through the lower shadow towards her,his face lifted like a pale blotch.

'Shall we go then?'he said.

'Where?'

'I'll go with you to the gate.'

He arranged things his own way.He locked the door of the hut and came after her.

'You aren't sorry,are you?'he asked,as he went at her side.

'No!No!Are you?'she said.

'For that!No!'he said.Then after a while he added:'But there's the rest of things.'

'What rest of things?'she said.

'Sir Clifford.Other folks.All the complications.'

'Why complications?'she said,disappointed.

'It's always so.For you as well as for me.There's always complications.'

He walked on steadily in the dark.

'And are you sorry?'she said.

'In a way!'he replied,looking up at the sky.'I thought I'd done with it all.Now I've begun again.'

'Begun what?'