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Lead with Presence

MYTH

It’s not possible to learn how to be a dynamic leader.

TRUTH

Leadership presence can be cultivated and is available to me.

Leading with presence is all about the signals you send out. It is how you portray yourself—through your words, actions, and appearance—as someone whom others trust and want to follow.

Many men and women buy into the myth that the presence exhibited by prominent leaders is something they were born with. In reality, leading with presence is a skill like any other; it can be cultivated with awareness and dedicated practice. Leading with presence involves being authentic, owning our strengths as well as our weaknesses, and speaking up on issues with integrity and passion.

As you might have imagined, the rules for leading with presence are much more complicated and nuanced for women than for men. As women, we face the double-edged sword of gender stereotypes. The lines between being assertive or being aggressive, taking charge or being overly ambitious, and being nice or being ineffective are so blurred (by both sexes) that hitting the right note can feel impossible. In Executive Presence: The Missing Link between Merit and Success, author and CEO of the Center for Talent Innovation, Sylvia Ann Hewlett, sums up the situation: “If you’re tough, you’re a bitch and no one wants to work for you, but if you’re not tough, you’re not perceived as leadership material and you won’t be given anyone to work for you. It’s a high-wire act that every capable woman has had to perform, and the higher she goes, the more perilous the act.”

In this precarious work climate, we women must pick our battles. We need to speak up if we think we can make a difference and it will strengthen our position. But if we think we will be judged poorly for making a point—one that is not high on our agenda—letting someone else pick up the slack might be best. Awareness is key, and we need to apply our best judgment and intuition to each situation.

This chapter offers concrete advice on how to build presence as well as inspiring stories from women leaders who have experienced firsthand the trials and tribulations of being visible and leading the pack. These leaders felt shaky at times, but they continued on. If they had retreated, they would have missed out on opportunities to advance up the career ladder and make a difference. The biggest takeaway from them is that you can act with presence even when you don’t feel 100 percent sure of yourself.